Rethink the road ahead, yo. OR ELSE. October 14, 2009

For a white hetero dude, he’s pretty OK! (Hey, that’s high praise coming from me!)

Paltzians, dudes, you’ve got to write a letter to the editor in support of Michael Nielson. OK? You know full well the New Paltz Times publishes every letter they get, and you also know that people vote for whoever’s (whomever’s??? Does anyone ever know that shit?) name they have heard more. The New Paltz Green Party had a great meeting with Mike last week and he really walks the environmentalist walk—and knows his shit well enough to know that we don’t have to spend more to make the Highway Department productive as well as eco-friendly. Check out his website, kick him some PayPal monies, and write a letter to the NPT, yo!!!!

As you know, I loathe Democrats both locally and nationally (it’s utterly amazing how in New Paltz they are just as weaseley as they are nationally! The Greens are a bunch of deadbeat freaks, I’ll be the first to admit that, but at least we’re not [except for maybe, oh, two], outright weasels). That said, there is a contingent of seriously progressive non-weasels who are trying to wrest control of their party from the demon clutches of the old guard, and they need to be supported. They seem to me to be real Democrats—that is, little d democrats who truly believe in, you know, de-fuckin’-mocracy. We’ll see.

Anyway, here’s the letter I wrote—no copying!

As a member of the New Paltz Green Party, I am proud to support Mike Nielson for New Paltz Highway Superintendent. Mike recently took the time to fill out the New Paltz Green Party candidate’s questionnaire, which asks detailed questions about issues important to Greens and other progressives in New Paltz (the questionnaire can be found at newpaltzgreens.org/elections.html). His answers were thoughtful and detailed and made me proud that we have a candidate running who is so clearly concerned with how the Highway Department can contribute to making New Paltz a more sustainable place to live. He has concrete plans to reduce carbon emissions, control beaver activity with nonlethal means, improve union relations, prioritize using permeable materials for grading and paving and more. I am convinced that Mike will work to make the Highway Department more efficient without scrimping on essential services and will always keep what is best for our town at the root of his policies.

Lagusta,
New Paltz

“Slow Dance” by Matthew Dickman October 10, 2009

More than putting another man on the moon,
more than a New Year’s resolution of yogurt and yoga,
we need the opportunity to dance
with really exquisite strangers. A slow dance
between the couch and dining room table, at the end
of the party, while the person we love has gone
to bring the car around
because it’s begun to rain and would break their heart
if any part of us got wet. A slow dance
to bring the evening home, to knock it out of the park. Two people
rocking back and forth like a buoy. Nothing extravagant.
A little music. An empty bottle of whiskey.
It’s a little like cheating. Your head resting
on his shoulder, your breath moving up his neck.
Your hands along her spine. Her hips
unfolding like a cotton napkin
and you begin to think about how all the stars in the sky
are dead. The my body
is talking to your body slow dance. The Unchained Melody,
Stairway to Heaven, power-chord slow dance. All my life
I’ve made mistakes. Small
and cruel. I made my plans.
I never arrived. I ate my food. I drank my wine.
The slow dance doesn’t care. It’s all kindness like children
before they turn four. Like being held in the arms
of my brother. The slow dance of siblings.
Two men in the middle of the room. When I dance with him,
one of my great loves, he is absolutely human,
and when he turns to dip me
or I step on his foot because we are both leading,
I know that one of us will die first and the other will suffer.
The slow dance of what’s to come
and the slow dance of insomnia
pouring across the floor like bath water.
When the woman I’m sleeping with
stands naked in the bathroom,
brushing her teeth, the slow dance of ritual is being spit
into the sink. There is no one to save us
because there is no need to be saved.
I’ve hurt you. I’ve loved you. I’ve mowed
the front yard. When the stranger wearing a sheer white dress
covered in a million beads
comes toward me like an over-sexed chandelier suddenly come to life,
I take her hand in mine. I spin her out
and bring her in. This is the almond grove
in the dark slow dance.
It is what we should be doing right now. Scrapping
for joy. The haiku and honey. The orange and orangutan slow dance.

no words October 9, 2009

Monday Misc: inadequate eyelashes [Friday] edition October 9, 2009

Some rapidly aging links I’ve been hoarding for a while:

In the ideas-change-over-time category, I’d like to publicly state that this article from Feministing has officially changed my mind about Zero Population Growth and the idea that trying to get people (i.e., women) to have less babies (which I still think is a splendid idea) is the very best way to accomplish environmental goals.

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Sweet seed librarian Ken has a good article all about—what else?—seed saving here at Civil Eats, which is a pretty rad site overall, actually.

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I didn’t mention this on the blog because it was pretty upsetting, but now things have calmed down a bit, so here we go: my best friends Noel and Selma’s restaurant, Bloodroot, was robbed a few weeks ago. Selma was slightly injured when she confronted the robber because he was stealing her precious knitting bag (which he most likely thought was a purse). Selma and I had a good chat about the whole thing last week, and she seems to be back to her serene, bizarrely-energetic, beloved self. Here’s a piece of our exchange:

“So, anyway, the day after the whole thing we were scheduled to go to our Weavers Guild [which is exactly what it sounds like]…”

[at this point, after Sel has told me the story of how she basically attacked this robber and a serious melee resulted, all I can think is: "Wouldn't you want to just stay in bed the next day?"]

“…and, you know, I figured, what am I going to do, just stay in bed all day? So we went.”

That’s my Selma.

You have to register to read the articles, but you can pretty much get the gist of what happened here and here’s a nice blog post about it (in the end she recovered the knitting bag, can you believe that? A kid apparently found it in the water while fishing!).

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Ready to be completely blown away by a product that is the absolute epitome, the perfect zenith, the utter apex of that age-old dynamic duo of capitalism + misogyny? I bring you: latisse. Warning: “there is potential for increased brown iris pigmentation which is likely to be permanent.” Um, this shit is gonna stain your eye?

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And sorry to end on a downer, but have you heard about Condé Nasty ruthlessly murdering Gourmet? I know it’s not vegan (though their “Vegetarian Tonight” column pretty much rocked it), but it’s by far the best food magazine out there…argh, it was. I’m really broken up about it. Now Gourmet subscribers are doing to get stupid idiotic stultifying Bon Appetit—LORD HELP US ALL.

stop the (wheat-free) insanity. Please. Now. For reals. October 8, 2009

There’s a lot to worry about in this old world of ours. Presidents without guts, race-to-the-bottom capitalism, technological advances rapidly overwriting our essential humanness, that the secretaries on Mad Men use typewriters that weren’t actually invented when the series is set—you know. Stuff.

If you’re vegan and/or some sort of health conscious eater (please note I am in no way saying the two go hand in hand), the following three concerns probably pass through your mind once in a while, and I really want to make it my mission that you do not concern yourself with them. Set your mind to worrying about something, anything, other than:

1) Wondering if you should stop eating wheat. My god, ENOUGH. I have no nutrition credentials apart from a few basic nutrition classes at my cooking school, but that’s not going to stop me from taking a stern, authoritative tone, because this is seriously out of control and is making me nuts (another thing you have no reason, apart from life-threatening allergy, to avoid): unless you have been diagnosed (and I’m not saying you can’t self-diagnose, but “self-diagnose” means “to do a lot of research and tests on yourself” not “I read this one article that said wheat is evil and thus I will heap guilt on myself for enjoying pasta for the rest of my life.”) with a wheat allergy or intolerance (and also? There is a difference, people, and when you’re running around saying you’re “allergic” to wheat and therefore can have only a bite of a cookie, you’re sort of really putting the lives of people who truly are allergic to wheat at risk by downplaying how serious it is.), and unless you have some freaky illness like candida where avoiding wheat for a period of time can be beneficial, there is no earthly reason why you should avoid this most delicious of grains. I mean, JESUS.

Speaking of the devil, my no-knead bread has been coming out AMAZING lately (though my 3 AM photo-taking skills still could use a little help). Peep this chocolate bread, yo! All marbled and swirly and roasty toasty. I added a half cup of sugar and handful of chopped choco to the dough before the second rise. (For the recipe, click that link in the top line).

It seems to me that wheat- and gluten-free products are increasingly combining with vegan products in some hellish one-size-fits-all approach to recipe development and marketing that is kiiiiiling me. Here’s the thing: being vegan is a POLITICAL choice. I know some people are vegan for their health, but us awesome vegans know it’s a political choice first and foremost. There is only one reason not to eat wheat: because you will die or get massively sick if you do. I really really really really resent that now when I go buy a POLITICAL vegan cookie it’s suddenly made with fucking oat flour or something just because some nutjob thinks that marketing a vegan cookie as “wheat-free!!” will sell twice as many. It implies that vegans are idiots who hop onto any trend, and that veganism is yet another marketing-driven faux trend.

That said, my heart of course goes out to those poor peeps who have true wheat intolerances and allergies and illnesses like candida, and I am happy that good companies can help them out with a cookie now and then. That’s peachy. However, the percentage of these people is so infinitesimal that I don’t really see why us POLITICAL eaters should have to suffer through dry-ass spelt cookies for the rest of time just so food manufacturers can profit off a (largely fake) wheat scare.

Kalamata olive bread and plain old NKB with a little sourdough added in for extra flavor. Ten minutes of work, this bread is, people. Ten minutes, at the most!

That said: we all eat too much wheat! It’s ridiculous. There is nothing wrong with wheat per se, but many mainstream eaters eat a shit ton of it and it’s fucking up their systems and so they go to a new agey nutritionist and she tells them that pasta is poison. This. Is. Irritating. Not because it’s untrue, exactly (a carrot will be poison if you eat 50 in a row), but because we all have to suffer because some people cannot make good choices and because 1% of the population cannot tolerate a food that humans have been eating for hundreds and hundreds of years.

So we should all be eating a wide spectrum of grains. That’s obvious and makes sense. I am the bestest BFF quinoa has ever had, but I don’t see why I should ever buy pasty quinoa pasta. Wheat is very, very, very, very good at what it does, and your corn pasta* and spelt cookies will just never be as good, let’s admit that. They can be differently wonderful, that’s the most I’ll give you (and don’t go crying to me about Babycakes [to which I shan't link]. It’s perfectly fine…fine stuff, just fine. Perfectly fine. Fine fine fine, that Babycakes. Just…..fine. They use really high quality ingredients and…and well, it’s fine. Why everyone seems to think—nope, I’m going to stop while I’m ahead. Why rag on other small biz owners, you know?).

Let’s review:

1. Wheat is fucking amazing.
2. Not being able to eat wheat is fucking tragic.
3. Happily, very few people have this problem. Fuck yeah!
4. I wish I knew (oh, but I do! Marketing! Money! The C word!) why all of the sudden half the smart people in the world think they need to stop eating wheat. It seriously bums me out. Because:
5. See point #1.

And now! Bring on the crew of WF zealots with their pamphleteering! Their rhetoric against my favorite grain! Their passionate Babycakeing, their obsessive grain mixes, their “I have so much more energy since I gave up eating [FIVE POUNDS AT A SITTING] pasta!”ing.

In the meantime, keep enjoying your tagliatelle, peeps.

Moving on:

2) Eating gluten: see above, but with more annoyance, in keeping with how annoying it must be to not eat gluten even though there is literally not ONE reason why a non-celiac should avoid it.

3) Eating too much fat. I’m sure we’re all most likely over this, but lists of two are no fun. VEGANS NEED (good quality) FAT!

What should you worry about, then?

Well, I still think people should be more worried about overuse of (here we go! My bestest pet peeve!): ye olde EB. Or you could worry about the vegan world’s obsession with sticky sweet trashy desserts. Worry about the “tofu ice cream” I had yesterday at an unnamed NYC hipster hotspot. Worry about the fact that I ordered it even after my brain had processed what the words meant. Worry about how bizarrely stringy it was—worry about what would cause ice cream to be stringy.

We’ve got a ways to go, babies.

Can you spot the hot pink sauerkraut in the background? (And yes, I like my bread a little burnt!)

*Full disclosure: rice pasta is freaking DELICIOUS, both the Asian kind and the yuppie brown rice health food store kind, I am not above admitting that.

The Last Supper October 3, 2009

Here are a few snaps from The Last Supper, the art show I was in last weekend in Brooklyn! There were so many amazing works on display—I took pictures of a few, but you can check them all out in more depth online here.

Artist statement card thingie

workin’ it…

awww…

Housing projects made out of graham crackers, complete with boarded-up windows, chimneys, and fences—how great are these??

utterly gorgeous sugar cookies

unbelievable sugar sculpture of a vase and swiss chard leaves

rice and beans!

hi! September 30, 2009

FUCK YOU!

That’s all I wanted to say.

Bye!

in which a rabid anarchist appears in….an ad. September 30, 2009

Because she so loves small businesses! And her dentist! (Even though he fills her mouth with dead people’s bones!)
And because…how fucking cute is this, if I say so myself???

memento mori September 29, 2009

One last hurrah, then it was all over.

Monday Miscellany! September 29, 2009

If you want to build a ship, don’t herd people together to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.

–Antoine de Saint-Exupery

How beautiful is that?

So, with that beginning, here we go:

My bike expert BFF Randy has himself a fascinating and thoughtful brand new biking blog!

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If you weren’t lucky enough to go to Mergefest XX, you can check out some lovely videos of most of the bands (mixed by my sweetheart) here!

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This sweetie, Leanne, left a comment here a while back, but in case you didn’t catch the link to her site I wanted to point it out: high-fashion gorgeous VEGAN COATS, PEOPLE!!!!! Are you dying? I am dying! I have a constant coat issue (it’s related to the constant winter shoe issue, which, by the way, is as of yet unresolved, even one year later) and know that someday I am going to have to fork over a lot of money just to have a coat I truly love (I have an idea this will somehow magically make me like winter). Sadly for my bank account but happily for everything else, I might have found The One. (On the other hand, my heart also beats wildly when it looks at this one—what say you?)

Also I know a boy who is getting this shirt for Hanukkah:

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A cute review of the bonbons here (ignore the vegan ridiculousness….)…

And I have a few more bits of interest, but am too tired from a long week of work (and fun!) to get into them—more soon!